Amazon Women Drink Diet Coke with Lime

Happy New Year, everyone. It has been a while since I have been able to post. I have not been able to catch up on reading others' blogs either. For that, I apologize and will get on it. It may take me a few days to catch up, though.

I spent a few days in Champaign, IL with my wife at her dad's house. It was decent time, but my observation about the natives there has been confirmed: Tall women live in Champaign-Urbana.

I notice this because I am not a tall person. As a matter of fact, my Champaign-born wife is taller than me. Think Billy Joel - Christy Brinkley. Well, that's how I like to think of it, anyway. Hopefully it will be a happier story than that one, though, but I digress.

Anyway, everywhere we went, women were at least 5'8 and more closely to 6'0. It got to the point where I saw a woman in Walmart that was about 5'5 and told my wife, "Look at that freak!"

So I took my wife, the Amazon, out of Amazon land - while she still had both breasts intact, btw.* She never has thanked me for that.

On another note, I found a good supply of Diet Coke with Lime there in Champaign. For those who have read my blog for a while, you remember when I whined about not being able to get it here anymore. I can only assume that this Diet Coke w/lime inspires growth in stature. Too bad I didn't have it earlier in life.
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*The Amazons of Greek myth not only participated in fighting and controlled politics, but exclusively made up both the population and the fighting force. They supposedly lived in the area north of the Black Sea about 700 years before the fifth century BC when the historian Herodotus reports hearing stories about them. According to myth, the Amazons were an all–female society of fierce warriors who got pregnant by neighbor–ing societies’ men and then practiced male infanticide (or sent male babies away). Supposedly they cut off one breast to make shooting a bow and arrow easier. (http://www.warandgender.com/wgamazon.htm)

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I know how you feel about your lime coke. When I used to drink soda, I had a hard time finding my favorite one.

Cherry Coke.

Well at least the Amazon women aren't like the female praying mantis.

Anonymous said...

Well, now you know where to find it! And I'm sure your wife appreciates being taken from Amazon-land intact...

I can't really relate to Amazons. I am 5'4" and starting to shrink (osteoporosis can do that to you). My husband is over 6 feet tall, and when he sets things "down", I can't see them (down being the top of the fridge). Then he wonders why I can't find anything. ...tall people (sigh)...

Nikki said...

Nothing wrong with being an Amazon lady. I'm between 5'7 and 5'8.

Though I can't drink the soda that you're talking about - it reminds me of medicine I used to have to take as a kid. I'm a Dt Mt Dew girl all the way....unless I can get some Dt Sundrop....that stuff is the yummiest.

Anonymous said...

Charles: Not yet, anyway. ;)

Sayre: Short Power!!! Actually, you are right on the average for females in the US.

Nikki: Dang! Just think how tall you would be if you were on Diet Coke with Lime!