Psychosomatic Wit: October 2007

All Hallows Eve

I am not on hiatus again, I was merely out of town. I went to my father-in-law's with my wife on and extended weekend thing. It was okay.

Today is Halloween and I have a number of things going through my mind. It is more significant to me, that it is the last day of the month, then it is some crazy holiday. Bills start pouring in now and I have to find ways to pay them. I used not have to give that a thought, but times - they are a changing.

Some people go all out for Halloween. I remember Roseanne on TV. She had great Halloween episodes. The Connors (Roseanne's TV family) practically worshipped Halloween. The Simpsons also have killer Halloween episodes, but I digress.

On the other hand, you have the religious zealots who think it is pure evil to acknowledge Halloween like it is some insult to God. As a Christian, I have heard all the arguments, but I just don't buy it. It is issues like this that makes a relationship with Christ turn into a legalistic religion. Halloween only has the power to be an evil force against God if you give it that power in your mind and heart. It can just be a goofy holiday where people dress up and kids get candy if you let it be just that.

If one is a Christian that shuns Halloween (and those who participate in it) as evil, then he should also shun Santa Claus, Christmas trees and Easter bunnies or risk being exposed as a hypocrite. If you don't like Halloween, fine - I don't care for it much myself. My advice is just igore it; it goes away, I promise. To make a big deal out of it is, well, just making a big deal out of it.

BOO!

A Tale of Two Hairdos, Part II.

A while back, I started a two-part post about hairdos. Then life happened and I didn't get to part II. It is funny, but through comments and on email, people have been saying how they are looking forward to part two. Well, if you are one of those people, today is your lucky day. To catch up, you can find Part One here.

MY WIFE'S HAIR

The past number of months, my wife has been on a change kick. She kept finding new things she wanted to change. I am not big on change, myself, on me or on her, but something was going to happen so I braced myself. Keeping my wife the way she was when I really fell for her seemed to be a good strategy to me. She has changed so many personality type things, that all I got is her appearance. Well, not that so much anymore.

My wife had long, beautiful, brown mermaid hair. Funny, the image I included here is not my wife, but it looks kind of like her. My wife generally wears contacts and doesn't have that sour look on her face, but other than that . . . I digress.

First, she wanted to cut her hair off.

NO!!!

Fortunately, she chickened out.

Then, she called me up from her dad's house in Illinois to tell me she had her cartilege pierced (the top part of the ear). She KNEW I didn't want her to do that, but . . .

Then, she started talking about getting a tatoo. I don't want to offend any reader but please . . . Let's just say that tatoos are not something I look for in a woman and leave at that. Somehow, she hasn't got one of those - yet. She doesn't even talk about it anymore, so hopefully, I am out of the woods with it.

A big change was inevitable (for some reason) so the next thing that came down the pike was changing her hair color. Since I know I have to pick my battles, I gave her my blessing (not that she needed it). She wanted to go blonde - not bleach blond, but a medium more realistic blonde. My sister came over and did it for her.

Most people that read me are female so I am not telling them anything new, but hair color is a crap shoot. If you want to get an accurate color before you dye your hair, forget it. It just doesn't work out. I guess there are too many factors.

My wife did NOT want any red in her hair. She believed that strawberry blonde was the worst thing that could happen. You guessed it, it came out strawberryish. Not too bad; I liked it, but that isn't important. She panicked, "It is ORANGE! It is ORANGE!!"

It wasn't orange. It had a slight red tent to it. I liked it - a lot. Stupid me. So at that point, she wanted to get it professionally done. Keep in mind this was in the midst of her unemployment and all the financial woes that come with that - that are still here, by the way, but I digress again.

She was determined, however, so her father who just happened to be in town took her. Seventy dollars later, she shows up with hair that is cut (layered), colored and highlighted. She was estatic! I was, too, because A) she was happy; and B) her dad paid for it.

Here is the kicker, though. I couldn't tell the difference between the strawberry blonde color she hated and this new color she adores. I started to tell her, but fortunately, wisdom got the better of me.

NEWS FLASH #18

NEWS FLASH is basically news or thoughts that may be changing over time - an update or an evolution of thought that covers a multiple of topics. It is what makes a blogger tick and it is the reason why we read. So, with that in mind, I came up with NEWS FLASH as an acronym that stands for what is going on in life:

News (or current events)
Entertainment (movies, TV, celebrity, etc.)
Work (thoughts on the job or employer)
Spirit (thoughts on God and/or the supernatural)
Family (or friends)
Love
Anxiety (a rant or a trouble)
Sports (also considered should be contests, reality tv, recreation, cards, games), and
Home (house, yard, or even another family type of thought.
___________________________________________________________________

NEWS - For the life of me, I can't figure out why anyone would live in California. If earthquakes, mudslides, and an ungodly high cost of living isn't enough, they have to deal with these stupid fires once or twice a year! Jiminy Christmas! There are plenty of nice places in Kansas or Colorado that they can live!

ENTERTAINMENT - I want to see a movie in 3D. Back in the day, they had plenty of these type of movies, but you don't see them much any more. The last time I saw one was in high school, but I don't remember what it was. It was a horror flick; that is all I remember. People tend to think that you have to give up good stories and acting for 3D, but I don't see why that must be so! Bring back 3D!

WORK - My new high school intern seems to be working out. I am shocked. She is a go-getter and I actually look forward to her days in the office. Plus, she is not afraid to make a phone call, for heaven's sake! The last one I had . . .

SPIRIT - My life got better when I surrendered it all over to God. Most Christians THINK they have done that, but they really don't realize that they really haven't until things go haywire. I wanted to control things. I wanted to solve the problems. In the midst of my hiatus, I just decided that if I lose my house, I lose it. If God wants me to keep it, I will keep it. If my wife can't work, then God will have to provide. Once I let all that go, my wife got a job and sold all kinds of stuff on Ebay at the same time. During this time, I didn't say a word to her about any of it. I just worked it all out with God silently. Now, if He could just get on this pesky back of mine. I would go to the doctor, but I would rather let God deal with it. :P

FAMILY - I spent Sunday afternoon with my nephew and his young wife watching football at a local establishment. Since finances forced me to abandon the NFL Sunday Ticket, I have been relegated to going places that have it so I can watch my beloved Bengals. It was a nice time, although my sister (the one I mentioned last time) cried when her son (my nephew) didn't come to see her while he was in town. As she put it, "Your kids will break your back when they are young, but will break your heart when they are older," - or something like that.

LOVE - I love me some roast beef, mash tatus and gravy. Seriously, the love thing with my wife has really taken a turn for the better. I am guardedly optimisitic. She even sent me a sweet e-card a few minutes ago.

ANXIETY - I am a little anxious about going away this weekend. I am going to miss a meeting, put more responsibilities on my sister (with my mom and feeding our dogs). Plus, being away from home with back pain doesn't sound good to me either. I am kind of a homebody anyway, so all this other stuff isn't helping. I can tell my wife appreciates it, though, so it is worth it.

SPORTS - Basketball season is just around the corner. College basketball is my thing and is second in my love only to the NFL. Sunday, I am going to see the University of Illinois' basketball team in their season kick-off scrimmage. My wife is a big U of I fan, so she is thrilled. I can't wait to see my beloved Hoosiers. This is the best time of year for me with the NFL going full tilt and college basketball arriving!

HOME - I think I am going to rent that stupid house I can't sell. I am going to make another phone call to a prospective buyer, but after that I am going to have to rent. It is sucking me dry! I hate renting, though. I hate being poverty stricken more, though.

That's it for the 'Flash! How many of you are still doing it?

There is Pain, but not a Window Pane

Bear with me as I try to get back into the swing of things again. I don't have much on my mind today other than my aching back. I don't know what I did, but Sunday morning, I woke up with a horrible muscle strain in my back. It has been killing me for the past two days. The picture here is exactly where it is (except it is on the other side).

Nothing seems to help. I have taken a boatload of Ibuprofen, Tylenol, Skelaxin, and Flexeril. Nothing! If I move, the pain is so bad that it takes my breath away and even causes me to cough sometimes.

Yet, here I am at work today. Why? Because my wife wants me to go with her to visit her family next weekend - spilling over into next week. I can't miss any this week if I am missing some next week. I don't want to go, but I never do so I think I should try.

My sister is concerned about me because I had a "vision" last week of my her going to see my wife at work, crying and telling her that I collapsed. It seems that I might have died by the way my sister looked, but I couldn't really tell. I guess I made the mistake of telling her because now she is way too worried about it. Thank God I said nothing to my wife about it.

I know, you are are thinking, "What are you talking about? What do you mean, 'vision'?" I don't know what to tell you other than I while was driving last week, my temples twinged and I saw this vision - it was kind of like a dream except I was driving so I was in both places at once. It hurt (my temples, that is) like the dickens, though, and I think we all know how much the dickens hurts.

I really didn't think too much of it except just a morbid curiosity of whether or not it had any legitimacy. I do make good predictions, sometimes, you know.

So, if you don't hear from me . . . ;)

NEWS FLASH #17

Bear with me while I am still unpacking. It was quite a trip (proverbially speaking), but it is good to be home.

NEWS - Have you heard about this new superbug staph infection thing that is killing folks in record numbers? I don't know if this could be considered as part of my predictions or not. Back in January, I predicted, "there will be a new pest related problem (insect, etc.) that will either threaten people's health or damage major agricultural production." Even though this thing is being called a "superbug", I guess it is a stretch. There was already some kind of thing that someone told me about that was agricultural some months back, but this is more what I had in mind.

ENTERTAINMENT - Saturday night, as a part of my one-year anniversary celebration, my wife and I saw The Classical Mystery Tour. It was wonderful! If you are even marginally a Beatles fan, you should do what you can to see this production. The Broadway cast of Beatlemania were accompanied by the Evansville Philharmonic Orchestra in a stunning time warp extravaganza (I don't have a joke here; I just like to use the term, "extravaganza"). Do yourself a favor and check here to see if this show is coming to a venue near you. (Psst, Charles, they are coming to Rochester.)

WORK - The office has calmed down. I should cruise into the new year from here - barring unforseen tragedies.

SPIRIT - I have been doing a lot of self-reflection lately. I have determined that I am a wretched human being. No, I don't steal or cheat on my wife, but my heart harbors some awful things that leaves a bad taste not only in my mouth but on down to the deepest part of my gut. I may explore this more in the future - probably in my other blog that most of you don't read, so you will be spared. However, I am in too good a mood to go there today.

FAMILY - I have two disable sisters and one disabled mother. One of my sisters STILL hasn't been granted "disabled" status although she has multiple physical problems that prevent her from walking much. Plus, she is in pain quite a bit and is an acute diabetic. She cannot work; she is going to lose her apartment (the power has already been cut off). She applied for disability two years ago and even has attorneys working on it. Now, she is sleeping on my mothers' couch. Because she isn't technically "disabled" yet, she also cannot get healthcare or consistently take her prescribed medications. She needs insulin twice a day, but she rations it. I am genuinely concerned about her future here on Earth. When I think about the status of healthcare here in the US, I am sickened by the greed that rules us in the guise of "healthy capitalism". Did I mention that I was in a good mood?

LOVE - As mentioned earlier, my wife and I have made it a whole year. We had a wonderful few days of celebration. We saw a play, went out for a nice dinner, ate some year-old wedding cake, and capped the thing off with The Classical Mystery Tour. Whodathunkit?!?

ANXIETY - My dog, Marley, will not leave his hip alone. He had a problem with it in the past. You can read about it at the link above, but it healed up - a few times. I think he has developed a habit of messing with it and so it never fully heals up. It used to be a growth, but now it is just a sore where he continues to irritate it. A few days ago, I put a funnel-collar on him so he can't get to it. I can't tell if it is healing up or not, but he is dangerous with that plastic monstrosity on his head. He terrorizes the other dogs with it, unknowingly, but they are scared to death of him when he wears it. You would think he had a Hoover upright on his head, for crying out loud, by the way the other dogs are acting.

SPORTS - My Cincinnati teams now have TWO African-American head coaches leading them. The Bengals have Marvin Lewis as the head coach of the team for the past five years. Now, the Reds named Dusty Baker to take over the manager duties of the baseball team. This is somewhat significant because Cincinnati has a reputation of being backward when it comes to racially equality. Congrats to the men and the city.

HOME - Things at home were the cause of my hiatis from the blog. Things seem to be stable now and that is a plus. My wife has started work as a veterinarian' assitant/secretary. This will help in a whole lot of areas. We need the income as many of you have kept up know, but also she gets (or will get) significant discounts on vet care. Hang in there, Marley!

I am not going to get into details about the reasons for my hiatis. Some things are best left alone. I often wondered if anyone out there had theories why I was gone. At any rate, I am back for now and hopefully permanently - but I can't promise.

In Route

Psychosomatic Wit is coming back and will be better than ever!

Nah, it will pretty much be the same, but will be back nonetheless.

Stay tuned!

NEWS FLASH #16

It is time for NEWS FLASH again. I will get to "A Tale of Two Hairdos, Part II" soon. It is just time to take care of blog business.

NEWS - After months of the campaign, I am leaning towards Hillary Clinton. Keep in mind, this is just a "lean". I am definitely not sold on her but she has inched ahead. The reason? She has the unique experience of having a look at power from both an executive and a legislator. Being a "hands on" first lady, she knows what it is like to approach the president's office from a governor's standpoint. She knows how the presidency works better than any other candidate and was part of a very successful team when she resided in the White House previously. She has been a senator for a number of years now, also, even convincing the red-hued upper New York that she is worthy of support. So, she has the legislative viewpoint covered. She has an intelligent and authorative presence in the debates. And, despite her "liberal" label, she is one of the most centrist candidates in the Democratic field. She is going to be tough to beat.

I know there are a few staunch Republican readers of this blog. If this is you, please tell me why the Republicans hate her so much - way more than the other Democrats in the field. I have never understood this. Of course, I am an independent, so I am out of the loop.

ENTERTAINMENT - The new fall TV season is underway. I haven't watched all of the shows I intended to, although I do have some recorded. I have seen a little of "Kid Nation" as the only new program I have seen so far. I am afraid I am not going to be able to keep track of it enough to enjoy it. So far, the highlights of the new season is the "Family Guy" Star Wars adaptation, and of course the unparalleled "The Office."

WORK - Just when I thought work was settling down, another big meeting was scheduled for this week. It is a little lower key, than the past one, but it is costing me precious free time. ;)

SPIRIT - My church is changing stuff and I am not pleased. I like to sit in the balcony but they are going to close it because they are adding a third service. They like people to be clustered for some reason. I don't like to be clustered plus I just hate change. Secondly, they are pushing the service that I go to 15 minutes later than normal from now on. Hate it. I like getting out in time to see almost the entire football game, now I will miss the first quarter or go to the early service (which is completely different in preacher, lesson, and worship than what I prefer). People always have to be changing stuff. Maybe this should be in the "Anxiety" section. ;)

FAMILY - My wife started a new job today. I pray that it works out for her. She is teaching preschool. She told me this is one job that she wouldn't have to quit if we had kids. She doesn't know it, but if that is the case, this is the only job she could have that would enable me to submit to having kids. ;)

LOVE - Things have rebounded some with my wife. The job helps, but even before, it was getting better. We did have a setback on her birthday and the few days after, but now we have things to build on again.

ANXIETY - The investor that was going to make me an offer on my house last week did not call me back. Another person I was expecting to call, didn't either. Same ol', same ol'.

SPORTS - I am supposed to be in Cincinnati tonight to watch the Bengals host the Patriots live for Monday Night Football. I can't make it, however. No money, no time. I probably could have put it together, but since this is the first day of my wife's new job, I want to be there for her.

HOME - My father-in-law is coming this weekend. Here in Evansville, we are having our week-long West Side Nut Club Fall Festival. This is no small deal. The fall festival here is the second largest (behind Mardis Gras) street festival in the US. If you Google "fall festival", this is the first site listed. It is always a blast and a big tradition around here.

In addition, I guess I can put this under "Home" because "Home" is kind of a catch-all, but I am considering entering a short story to be published in a local literary magazine. I don't know if I am going to do it or not, but I got a great story idea in the shower this morning. Ah, but so little time.